Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Diary 5 march

Today was a good day.
I did some fitness, watched some of Dave Canterbury's trapping videos on youtube, played with the kids and I ended this day with playing poker with my girlfriend.

I notice a change in my behaviour and a change in the way I think.. I knew it would soon come to this.. The voice inside my head that tells me to stay....

It is the voice that tells you to stop following your path, your dream, your ambition. The voice tries to convince you that you head out to surten death. It tries to poison my mind with guilt towards my parents and most of all my children. It tells you to stick with the old or that you need more time for closure..
But, as always, I do not give in, I can't stop now and I shouldn't.... of course I don't really hear voices but you get the point.

Because at the same time I'm having visions (of course not real visions but.. :) ) where I'm in a pineforest sitting near a lake, behind me is my campfire and cozy shelter, The traps are all set and I'm off to do some fishing and the mountains on the other side of the lake are shinning in the mid-day sun...
Yes I know, I'm romanticizing things but on the other hands it helps to keep a positive attitude.

Tupac Shakur - Never had a friend like me


  1. No matter what, don't give in. Publish a post today that is directed to yourself saying: DO THIS! To memorize you want to do this, if you decide to not do it.

    1. I will not give in ;)
      I have come so far, learned so much.. I have put a lot of effort, energy and time in this... how should I call it.. the goal of my life.

      I could stay here and continue woking on my career of becoming a nobody, living a life that leads nowhere, that is pointless.

      I could also leave and head to being surrounded by nature.. the earth at it's best, breath the fresh air, doing something extraordinary with my life and live independent.

      The choice is easily made. I'm heading out. Sure it is getting harder but not hard enough to make me quit. It's completely normal you'll probably experience it too when it's about your time to travel :)

  2. I was wondering eh,

    How are you going to plan your clothing?
    It's not like us humans have fur to protect us from the weather. (Terrible evolution IMO, fur is so much more usefull!)
    What if it tears etc.? Won't you at one point just be with pretty much no clothing?
    Hygiene doesnt matter that much, noone gives a shitif your clothes smell since noone is there with you, although it does make hunting harder..

    1. When I take a look at all the stuff I'm bringing with me then most of it is either food or clothing and clothing is one of the most important things to bring with you. Crossing germany in early spring is great but surviving in Russia in the midst of winter is a total different story. And a shelter and fire is not enough to protect you from the elements.
      But on topic now..

      I will be bringing some needles and thread with me for quick fixes but we both now that there will come a time that my clothing would be to teared in order to fix it. Walking to the tundra bare naked equals death so one day I will have to go primitive and use animal skins and i have always liked the idea of "fully using a dead animal corpse". This goes for more then just clothing.. My knives, poncho, boots, compass, backpack.. they all will one day have to be replaced with primitive technology.

      You're right when it comes to hygeine.. as long as it isn't so bad that it can make you sick it doesn't matter if you smell bad or not. Do you know what the funny thing is? It's the exact opposite: less hygeine makes for better hunting. Many animals can smell your deoderant, your soapy skin and the washing powder in your clothes from miles away.

      Before I head out I'm going to wash all my clothing in the laundry machine with water only.. that's one of the most usefull things I learned from a hunter.
      I was already planning to write a post on Hygiene in the outdoors.. so I'll get back on that later