I did some fitness, watched some of Dave Canterbury's trapping videos on youtube, played with the kids and I ended this day with playing poker with my girlfriend.
I notice a change in my behaviour and a change in the way I think.. I knew it would soon come to this.. The voice inside my head that tells me to stay....
It is the voice that tells you to stop following your path, your dream, your ambition. The voice tries to convince you that you head out to surten death. It tries to poison my mind with guilt towards my parents and most of all my children. It tells you to stick with the old or that you need more time for closure..
But, as always, I do not give in, I can't stop now and I shouldn't.... of course I don't really hear voices but you get the point.
Because at the same time I'm having visions (of course not real visions but.. :) ) where I'm in a pineforest sitting near a lake, behind me is my campfire and cozy shelter, The traps are all set and I'm off to do some fishing and the mountains on the other side of the lake are shinning in the mid-day sun...
Yes I know, I'm romanticizing things but on the other hands it helps to keep a positive attitude.
Tupac Shakur - Never had a friend like me