Diary 18 april

My dear Friends, Readers, future Adventurers and those alike..

My last post was a little short while so much has happened lately in my life.
Like I said; Me and my girlfriend have broke up and I moved out in order to keep the peace. She kept the house, the children and my money so I'm basicaly left with nothing.
It seems stupid of me to agree with this but I did it for the kids.. They need to stay there close to their school and family and since their school, clothes, food and what not needs to be payed from my income I had no choice but to leave my money and bankcard there for the moment. Then again money means little to me so I'm not upset. Since the break up I'm staying with my family. At first with my father and steph-mom, and now at my stephmom's sisters home in Delft.
I am taking it easy here.. I'm not angry anymore at my ex-girlfriend or her family, as a matter of fact I decided to not get angry anymore at anyone or anything.. I'm all peace..

The whole idea of not being connected to the internet for weeks would have scared the crap out of me in the past but lately my situation was just that, and I didn't got bored for a single second. My life has been turned upside down.. I am surrounded by the most friendly people imaginable, they provide me with shelter, food and comphort without asking anything in return. Back then in Velp I thought these kind of people were extinct. I am keeping my mind occupied by being creative.
I'm reading books, writing poetry and hymns, drawing with pencil and charcoal and I'm busy with painting Aphrodite.  Is there an artist awakening inside of me or is it in fact a way of keeping myself distracted so I do not have to face the fact that I miss my children?  Maybe a bit of both.
And I do miss them, I wonder how they are doing and what they are doing. Apart from that I'm doing better then ever.
I'm sitting here in the garden. The sun is shining, flowers are everywhere. Spring has arrived and there's calmth coming over me, it feels like a constant state of meditation. I will be moving to Velp again the 4th or 6th of may (probably) to live on my own, from there on I will be preparing and biting my time until I leave the 25th.
All goes as planned....

Regards, Ralph